A Year Ago Today…

• Veronika weighed 11lbs and 4 oz.
• She rolled from her stomach to her back for the first time!!
• She was a week away from her 6 month mark!
• And ready to celebrate her first Christmas!
• It was 5 days since her birthparents had signed papers to make me her legal guardian.
• And both of us were still recovering from the trauma we went through when her birthmother tried to take her back.

Today…

• Veronika weighs 23 lbs and 12 oz.
• She is a week away from her 18 month mark!
• And she is ready to celebrate her second Christmas!!
• I am delighted to be Mama to my bright, active, toddler!

How well I remember that cool, cloudy day which seemed to drag on endlessly while I waited to hear the footsteps of Veronika’s Birth mom. Finally at 4:00 in the afternoon I heard the shuffle of her feet on the porch and saw her face peering in the screened window. Trembling, I opened the door and let her in, trembling, I explained how to give Veronika’s medicine and how to mix the milk and then trembling, I laid my dear unsuspecting baby into her arms. I was actually in such pain and distress and disbelief the tears could not even come. I knew that when the tears started they would never stop…

I was in my dark room laying on the cold concrete floor, crying and crying.

And then how my heart jumped when I heard the shuffling footsteps again and heard the familiar voice of my baby’s mom asking for me!!!

The one mile ride through the dark, over roads riddled with potholes took much too long as we made our way to pick up my dear baby again. I remember peering out the front windshield and seeing rats peeking out of the long grasses by the side of the muddy road. I rung my empty hands and willed the truck to go faster…

I remember stepping out of the truck following Mom through the darkness; it was strangely silent, only the shuffling sound of people moving and the sound of a baby’s cry. I followed into a tiny house crammed with ladies and children who parted to make way for me as I entered…

There was my baby, Oh blessed sight!!! They pushed me into an empty chair and laid my baby girl into my arms! And the world became right! I held Veronika’s trembling little body close to my heart and all the ladies clucked and said, “ Look, she just wanted her Mama.” 

And truly that was what she wanted- her Mama!! A year later that’s still what she wants!!